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To My Future Child: Dear Daughter

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Dear Daughter,

I have been dreaming about you from long before I met you, so believe me when I tell you this, you are the biggest blessing to have ever been bestowed upon me. There are many times in my life that I doubted I would ever be capable of being a mother, but now that I know you, I know without a single doubt in my heart that this was always meant to be. Deep and true love always finds it way home; naturally, mine found its way to you. My dear, you are the greatest love of my life and I pray to God that I can show this to you daily through the little things.

But, as much as I love you, I am terrified.

I am absolutely terrified of bringing you into this world where the colour of your skin and the type of genitalia you have determines your value. It is crazy to me that the whiter your skin, the less of a moving target you are. I am terrified of letting you grow in a world where women are treated like second class citizens, like objects, and killed in the name of a so called ‘honor’. But most of all, I am terrified that I will not be enough for you. I am terrified that on the days you will need me the most, I will not be enough.

So, my dear daughter, these ten promises I make to you:

  1. I promise to educate you to the best of my ability
  2. I promise to teach you self-care every way I know how
  3. But, I also promise to present and emotionally available for you
  4. I promise to be your mother before I am your friend
  5. I promise to never let the phrase “but what will people say” enter my thoughts or leave my mouth
  6. I promise to never treat you differently because you are a girl
  7. I promise to inspire you daily with the softness of God’s light
  8. I promise to teach you love
  9. I promise to empower your independence and teach you how to think, not what to think
  10. And lastly, I promise that you will always know that I love you

I know, my dear daughter, that it will be many years before you ever read this letter, but I hope that when you do, you see that I have been trying daily to fulfil my promises to you and ensure you are living your best life. You are the most beautiful person I have and will ever meet, and I promise to spend every moment of my life showing you just how great of a blessing you are not just for me, but this world.

My dear daughter, I need you to know that you are life itself. Made up of entirely good parts, there is nothing but love and light that I see in you. May all the days of your life be good, and may all the days of doubt and sadness be a blessing in disguise. You are always enough.

May our love for each other flourish as beautifully as these flowers have done.

Your loving mother,
Ayesha.

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Ayesha Khanom

Sometimes a teacher, sometimes a student, but mostly caffeinated. This blog is a terrible attempt at writing out my thoughts - think of it as the 'comments, complaints, and suggestions' section of my brain. Nevertheless, I hope that some of these words will find a place in your heart and will stay with you even when I do not. If you'd like to get in touch, send me a message on Instagram or leave a comment on one of these posts and I'll get back to you at the best possible time.

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