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Feeding the Soul

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This week has been an interesting week. Actually, scratch that. This past month has been an interesting month. So many things are different, and yet, still the same. I guess if I really sit down and think about it. It’s not the things or situations that are different, it’s me. I, myself, am entirely different to who I once was. Now, I don’t mean to say that the old me is dead and gone, or that life has suddenly transformed me. What I mean is that, I am in a much better place than I once was. I am more sure of who I am and what I want out of life, and exactly what I need to be doing in order to create a version of life I’d like to lead. 

I feel like a bit of a broken record right now, but truth be told, I write what I wish I’d have heard or read during my darkest days. For those of you who might still know me from way back when, you’ll know that life has thrown its fair share of troubles my way, and while they have never really trickled their way into the public eye and I always seemed to have ‘everything good’ on paper, there is no denying that the way I carried myself was entirely different. The lens through which I saw life was a lot darker and didn’t really hold very much room for hope. In fact, it didn’t hold very much room for anything but pessimism and the fragility of one’s own mortality. I was so far down on my own priority list that sometimes I forgot I was created to be an individual with my own sense of self. But, I am trying to change that.

As I go and grow through life, I am learning and unlearning the fact that being in your twenties makes life feel like a race against time. But, we’ve been sold a lie. Life isn’t a race and you do not have to compete. Your twenties are not a marathon and you haven’t spent your life working to reach your peak in this decade. Slow down and take each day as it comes. 

Big things will happen. You may fall in love. You may graduate.You might begin the career of your dreams. You may start the rest of your life. Or you may not. And that’s okay. You don’t need grand milestones and gestures to commemorate your twenties. You just need to be willing to wake up every morning as though it is a chance to start all over again. 

You will make mistakes. Fall in love with the wrong people. Work a job you hate. Lose friends. All of these things will happen, but there is only one thing that will get you through, and that is yourself. You are the only one who can pick yourself up from your mistakes. You are the only one who can turn your dreams into reality by choosing to take a step towards them.

You are your biggest support system. Learn your strengths and weaknesses, feed your soul the right things, and live a life that you are proud of.

I leave you now with one of my favourite sayings:

Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.

Mawlana Jalal ad-Din Rumi

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Ayesha Khanom

Sometimes a teacher, sometimes a student, but mostly caffeinated. This blog is a terrible attempt at writing out my thoughts - think of it as the 'comments, complaints, and suggestions' section of my brain. Nevertheless, I hope that some of these words will find a place in your heart and will stay with you even when I do not. If you'd like to get in touch, send me a message on Instagram or leave a comment on one of these posts and I'll get back to you at the best possible time.

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